What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
