I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
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