then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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