Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize