absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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