he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
