Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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