I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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