Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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