I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
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