I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
MIDGETS
????
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
