It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
As shirtless as possible
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize