I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
