Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Found your dick twin last night
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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