its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
