i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Oh god it's open bar.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
