Midget sex pt 2 tonight
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
