Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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