i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I hate all girls vehemently.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
