whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
