Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
