I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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