So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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