Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
