Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
