You can't special order awesome
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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