Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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