I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
im six kinds of drunk right now
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
my poor anus
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
