At least make sure they are 18
Why
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
