road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
