it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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