Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
We have started to decorate penises.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
