roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
