Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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