Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
So apparently I’m into choking now
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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