At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
