got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
it's like heaven, but drunker
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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