my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Randomize
