It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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