found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
