I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
