dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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