don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize