Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
