Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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