Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
