if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
This is the high leading the old right now
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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