even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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