Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Randomize
