I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
